What is happiness?
Happiness means different things to different people. To me, one of the things it means is continuing to do fun things despite my misophonia.
I personally can’t allow my misophonia to hold be back. I simply can’t. Otherwise I would miss out on so much. But that doesn’t mean I have to push myself to the point where I’m about to snap.
So, what does it mean? It means that I have to recognize my safe limit, be okay with it, and then work with it. For instance, I went to see a Beauty and the Beast production and I had my earplugs out. I wanted to see if I’d be ok. I also had my headphones just in case. As I waited for the doors to open, there were a lot of people and I could hear my worst trigger: “S” sounds. Everywhere.
I told myself to be calm and tried distracting myself by reading the program. That worked a little bit. But once I got seated and waited for the play to start, I had to put my earplugs in. And that did the trick. But I wasn’t at a point where I wanted to go punch something and scream. I recognized that I wasn’t okay without my earplugs in this situation, and dealt with it.
If I had let my misophonia prevent me from going altogether to see the play, I would have missed experiencing the talent from actors and actresses in my hometown. And, I would have missed catching up with a good friend during intermission. I pushed through and had a good time in the end. Each time I do, it’s a victory against misophonia.
I’m very aware of the fact that there are people who simply can’t. To them, I’m sorry it’s so bad, and I wish you could be as lucky as I am for being able to continue doing things. I truly hope that there are other ways for you to be happy despite the hell that is misophonia.
Happiness is much more than that for me, but if I talked about them all here, I’d go on and on. So I’ll try to sum up everything that is happiness for me in a few words:
Faith in God, hope in a brighter tomorrow, and endless love from my special person.
I apologize for my absence last week. I had internet connection issues, and recently just had a strong wind that knocked out the power at my house. But I’m back! You all might get two posts this week. 🙂
See you next week!