I had another not-so-great week, and it was hard to find the good that came from it.
This week, my dad triggered me to the point of scratching my face and hitting my head. I was in the car, so I couldn’t escape. The rest of the week has been me trying to cover up scab marks (which aren’t too bad, but still) with makeup. Reading that, you might think “Wow, how can anyone find a positive moment in the week after trying to hide the fact that they hurt themselves?”
Fortunately, I had a backup plan.
In order to keep myself from being miserable about what happened, I talked to my friends. I sang at church on Sunday, hung out with my boyfriend, and occupied my time with homework and studying. And, recently, I made an effort to smile.
I also downloaded this cool gif maker, which helps me act silly and kept me smiling.
Smiling for no reason has always been a bit of a challenge for me. So, I’m looking to change that. Smiling this week has seriously lifted my mood, as well as laughing and hanging out with my friend L again. I have the help of the gif maker app, as well as my friends and boyfriend to keep me sane.
I realize hitting and scratching myself is an unhealthy habit to develop, and I’m going to try not to do such things. However, in the moment I’m triggered, the intense pain I feel from the sound is so overwhelming that I can’t think straight, especially if I’m trapped in a car. Therefore, inflicting physical pain helps lessen the mental pain a little. Again, this truly is unhealthy, and I need to find another way to cope. Despite being triggered this week to the point of hurting myself, the positive coming out of it has been me just…smiling. Staying positive.
Speaking of positive, sign-ups for an online event called “Misophonia and Positive Vibes” are open today! Check it out here: http://misophoniaweekly.com/events/positive-vibes/
See you next week, and don’t forget to smile!