Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light. -Albus Dumbledore.
This famous quote by Albus Dumbledore in the Harry Potter movies is something I’ve taken and applied to my life, especially when it comes to misophonia. In my introduction of the blog, I said I was going to focus on being positive while also bringing awareness to misophonia. So, today, I want to talk about how I remain positive. It’s not easy. But it’s very doable.
However, before that, let me tell you what went through my mind when I first started experiencing “symptoms” of misophonia. I was about 10 years old. I was scared out of my mind and wondered what was happening. I absolutely abhored certain sounds and I felt I was losing a battle I never dreamed I’d have to fight. Never did I imagine misophonia interfering outside the family house. And when it did start interfering, it interfered hard. First with people I somewhat knew, then strangers, then teachers, then friends, now my boyfriend.
As you can see, these thoughts started off very negative. But, as the years went by, I learned how to live with this debilitating condition. I realized remaining positive is important in keeping my sanity. This doesn’t mean I’m not realistic. I know very well misophonia doesn’t have a cure and it may get even worse, something I figured out when I started getting triggered by my boyfriend. But why does that mean I have to become negative about my future?
So, I’ve figured out how to stay positive:
1. Remembering I have my own safe and quiet space: my room. I look forward to relaxing there at the end of the day.
2. Life doesn’t suck because I have misophonia. It really doesn’t. Not yet anyway. I’m doing everything I like to do NOW if it gets to the point where it’s too late: going to movies, hanging out a lot with friends, and singing in a choir just to name a few.
3. Remembering I’m loved. My parents and other family members love me no matter what. My boyfriend is extremely loving and supportive as well. And of course my best friend, who lives on the other side of the world, is also very supportive. These people, and others I didn’t mention as there is a long list, are tremendously important in my life, and it’s because of them that I’m still striving toward an end goal.
4. My religious life brings me peace. My church offers adoration, a time alone with the Lord. I’ll be honest, I haven’t gone to many of them, but when I do go, my time with God brings me peace I wish I could experience 24/7. This time of silence and prayer is refreshing, and renews my faith.
There may be some people who ask what the point is to staying positive. There also might be those who think it’s stupid, and that having any sort of hope is foolish because misophonia will drain it. Let me go back to Albus Dumbledore’s quote. Even in the darkest of times, happiness can be found if you just remember to turn on the light. In my dark misophonia moments, the times when I’m overly triggered and exhausted, thoughts of giving up do arise. But just for a moment. Why? Because I remember to turn on the light. I think about all the blessings I have in life that other people don’t. I feel a rush of relief at the thought of knowing my life isn’t as hard as it could be, all because I have people who are willing to help me. This doesn’t calm me down completely, but when I’m home and safe in my quiet space, thinking about those positive things prevent me from having dark thoughts that may arise in my alone time. By remembering the people around me who love and support me (also known as my “light in the darkness”), it makes misophonia a little more tolerable.
Find your light. Remember to turn it on in the dark times. And never lose hope.
See you next week. <3