My apologies for the silence. I’ve been very busy and couldn’t post on here, but I’m back!
I was busy helping out at my local church for their Vacation Bible School. I volunteered to be the photographer, so I had my camera and took a bunch of pictures. Here’s a picture I took of myself with a polaroid camera:
I’m glad I decided to help out this year because in doing so, I learned a few lessons in terms of my misophonia and sensory issues.
- Focusing on a task. When I’m doing something–like taking pictures–I am able to push my misophonia to the back of my mind. It’s not that I’m not triggered, but I’m more able to handle it when I need to get something done. I’ve noticed this in other situations too. When I participated in a Border Patrol Citizen’s Academy earlier this year, I could, for the most part, focus on the things I had to do when I was there. This included paying attention to whoever was talking, and putting all my attention on the activity we were doing.
- Knowing my limit. Vacation Bible School was hectic, and there were noisy and rowdy kids everywhere. Sometimes the music that was played at the start and end of the day was triggering as well. When I got home at the end of each day, I was relieved and happy to finally relax. But when I got home on the third day, I felt especially overwhelmed, and broke down. I realized that three days of noise and kids was exhausting. Even though I was the photographer, and I got to go to different places and wasn’t confined to one area, it was still tiring. I had two more days to go, and knowing that, I knew I could continue helping out. I made sure to take it easy the next few days so I could perform efficiently. And I was ok! I knew my limit, and worked according to it.
I always thought my misophonia would prohibit me from doing what I wanted. In a sense, it still might. But I’ve been pushing myself to do things I want, and training my brain that it can withstand triggering stimuli for awhile. And as soon as I start feeling overwhelmed, I remove myself from the situation and cool down. I’m doing this because I’ll be volunteering as a Court Appointed Special Advocate soon, and I want to be able to do my job efficiently. If things work out for me there, this could lead to a future job as an employee. These lessons I’ve learned have helped me so far, and I’m hoping that with time, I’ll perfect them. Maybe–and this might be a huge stretch–misophonia will just be a minor annoyance in the future if I keep this up. Or maybe there will be something I can take that will help lessen the intensity of my triggers. Only time will tell, I suppose.
On a side note, I register for classes today. I’m hoping all goes well, and that I can perform efficiently in my classes.
See you next week!